As I return again to my roots in the Episcopal Church, I find myself drawn into the Liturgical calendar. Each new day, new season brings new insights and ideas. To read these and undertand them is to catch a glimpse into my soul and mind. I hope to share these ideas with you and archive the past ones.
August 15, 1999 - Twelfth Sunday after Pentacost
I know it's been a while since I last updated, but life takes precedence over webpages. I've since finished "The Cloister Walk" and "Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom" - both very good and highly recommended.
I'm back to trying to read the "Forward Day by Day" nightly and attempting a sojurn through Compline and my daily dose of the psalms. Very interesting ready, those Psalms. It's amazing the verses I recognize from other portions of Scripture.
Anyway, the current author of FDBD has made some interesting points recently that have caused me to stop and think. He points out that Mark 8:11-21 is an arguement not to take the Bible literally - if we take Jesus' words at face value, we may miss his meaning. We have to surrender our interpretation to His.
Second, he points out that the authority of Scripture is not about avoiding inconsistencies. Even Jesus "disobeyed" Scripture when he healed on the Sabbath. (Which I must mention, I don't think He necessarily disobeyed Scripture - the Jews had so narrowly defined what could be done on the Sabbath, that I think they missed the point. God didn't set those minutae - man did.) Anyway, the authority of Scripture has to do with being faithful to the Spirit of the Living God. God is allowed to change his mind. If He didn't, most likely you and I would be heathens or still offering burnt sacrifices. But He chose to spread the Gospel, the Good News, to the Gentiles. Hence we obtained the opportunity of salvation. Otherwise, we'd be SWOC (scattered without a clue).
This theme (that God can change His mind) finds a complimentary point in Acts 21:37 - 22:16. It's the story of Saul's conversion. The FDBD author points out that when Saul persecuted the Christians, he was doing what he thought was right and standing up for what he believed in. But God turned his world upside down. The point is, our beliefs about God are not sacred. God is.
...Reading back through this, it appears (and probably rightly so) that I am rallying against the complaint/accusation regarding inconsistencies in the Bible. I grow weary of the protests and excuses, the nitpicking. Kathleen Norris had a brilliant reply to the grumbling about hypocrites in church - "The only hypocrite I worry about on Sunday morning is myself." We are all hypocrites to some extent...who among us can really cast that first stone?
Back to Biblical inconsistencies...
I get the feeling that those complaining are uncomfortable with the thought that they might be wrong. So they make excuses to placate themselves, making huge issues of minor things. When will they realize that faith is not about convincing your head there is a logical explanation for everything? Faith is belief. Trust. Believeing with your heart when you can't believe with your head. It goes beyond hope - it's so much deeper than that. Similar, yet deeper than intuition. It's trust. (Ah, the poet in me struggles - I speak better in metaphors and similies.) It's looking up at a starry sky and knowing that you and the stars are not there by chance...that a higher being - GOD - created them and you, and He knows them - and you - by name.
I do believe that God reveals himself through nature - sunsets and thunderstorms, the quiet whisper of a gentle wind, the silent snowfall, the falling of leaves, the unfolding of spring's first flower... We only have to look and see and appreciate it.
Well. I do believe that's quite enough rambling for one night.
May 20, Thursday, Week of the Seventh Sunday of
Easter
Alcuin
A friend and I were talking the other night about when and why he had stopped going to church. He said once he learned of evolution, the contradictions put doubts in his mind that were too hard for him to overcome. I had no argument at the time but to simply say that to me how the world was created was unimportant; what was important was that God created it - and He's God, so He can do so however He likes.
Later, I got to thinking that how the world was created is not the point of being a Christian. The fact that God sent Jesus to die on the cross as the One and Final Sacrifice for us because He loved us enought to give up a part of Himself to redeem us - THAT is the point of being a Christian. A personal relationship with God, accepting His great mercy, His forgiveness, His love. It is watching our life being transformed into a wonderful and new thing - of letting Him transfuse us into a new creation.
Oh! Had those words been ready at my lips! But I suppose that hindsight is 20/20 and I am but a cracked vessel that God has chosen to use. I know that I am not perfect, but I hope that I am willing enough to let God break and remold me into something wonderful, refining me into a bejeweled gold chalice that runneth over with the blessings He heaps upon me.
May 13, Thursday, Week of the Sixth Sunday of Easter
Ascension Day
1 To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm
of David. O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is thy name in all the earth!
Thou whose glory above the heavens is chanted
2 by the mouth of babes and infants, thou hast founded a bulwark because
of thy foes, to still the enemy and the avenger.
3 When I look at thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the
stars which thou hast established;
4 what is man that thou art mindful of him, and the son of man that thou
dost care for him?
5 Yet thou hast made him little less than God, and dost crown him with
glory and honor.
6 Thou hast given him dominion over the works of thy hands; thou hast
put all things under his feet,
7 all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field,
8 the birds of the air, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along
the paths of the sea.
9 O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is thy name in all the earth!
--Psalms 8 (English-RSV)
I do wonder..."what is man that thou are mindful of him"? It boggles the mind to think that a Being - who knows what has happened, what is happening now (even all the secret things), and what will happen - even cares about us. To think that we were all in His mind when the world began, that He knew us before we were born - I feel special. After all, THIS is what matters: that He loves and cares for us and desires the same in return, that He wants to know us, have a relationship with us. It doesn't matter how He chose to create the world, but it matters that He sent His Son, a dear part of Himself to show us how much He cares. THIS is the God I believe in: a loving, caring, protective, holy, and awesome God. THIS is my God.
April 12, Monday, Week of the Second Sunday of Easter
This week I prepare for the Quiet Day the women at my church are having this Saturday. As the day approaches, I try to quiet my mind and soul. To be quiet and ponder the majesty of God sounds heavenly. It seems, however, rather difficult to be quiet. I am used to having some type of noise around me at all times - whether the radio, the tv, or even me singing - something, anything to keep me from thinking. Then I ponder, what am I afraid of learning about myself, about how I feel if I should allow myself to think? And so I must learn, must practice, being quiet and being still before God.
Prayer for Quiet Confidence (from the Episcopal Book
of Common Prayer)
O God of peace, who hast taught us that in returning and in confidence
shall be our strength: By the might of thy Spirit lift us, we pray thee,
to thy presence, where we may be still and know that thou art God; through
Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
April 11, Second Sunday of Easter
2 The LORD builds up Jerusalem; he gathers the outcasts
of Israel.
3 He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds.
4 He determines the number of the stars, he gives to all of them their
names.
5 Great is our LORD, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond
measure.
6 The LORD lifts up the downtrodden, he casts the wicked to the ground.
I love the picture of God that this passage paints. It is one of a gentle, loving, fatherly God.
I can see him as a father gathering to him those lost children who have no home, tending them, putting a band-aid and a kiss on their hurts...which sets me to thinking about the Albanians and the whole sad situation. (I really don't see the point in bombing them after they have supposedly signed a peace agreement. Do we keep punishing them for doing what we wanted? They may still be killing their enemies, but doesn't someone have to stop first? If we're bombing 'cause they're killing, and they're killing 'cause we're bombing, what is the use of that?) But moving on, it awes me to think that He set all the stars up there...and that he has counted them and knows them each by name. We have resorted to numbers, there are so many.
May we all remember the awsome, the tender, the loving side of our God. And pray for those being slaughtered and those in power - may there be a soon and just end to the situation.
How wonderful it was to once again speak the word "Alleluia" again yesterday - like a a cool swallow of water for a parched throat. And to not just say it, but to sing it, to shout it! Truly a joyful word and a joyful time! My favorite day of the litugical calendar - the day that gives meaning to Christmas, to Good Friday, to our faith - without Easter, we have nothing. Nothing at all.
"Jesus Christ is risen today! Alleluia!
Our triumphant holy day! Alleluia!"
"I am too eager for spring. Around Crosswicks, the sere fields need their blanket of snow to prepare the ground for growing. In my heart I am too eager for Easter. But, like the winter fields, my heart needs the snows of Lent." -Madeleine L'Engle, The Irrational Season
March 29, 1999, Tuesday, Sixth Week of Lent
Despite the fact that I am ready for Easter to be here NOW, the Litugical calendar tells me that first I must face Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday. So many people overlook these days. Can you imagine what it was like for Jesus' disciples and friends? He said he was coming back, but they had seen him die. They hadn't seen anyone come back from the dead - except Lazarus. It must have been with a heavy heart that they passed the Sabbath. A friend, a brother, a son - he was dead.
How surprised the Marys must have been when they arrived at the tomb and found it open. How little faith! They thought that his body had been stolen when Jesus had tried to tell them that no one could keep him in the grave. I cannot judge, however. I too am blind and deaf to what He tries to tell me.
We know the end of the story! For us, these days enable us to reflect on what happened and how that makes Easter all the more special to us. For after all, without Easter, Christmas has no meaning and, without Good Friday, Easter has no meaning.May you have a truly blessed Easter - spend it with those you love.
March 25, 1999, Thursday, Fifth Week of Lent
1 A Song of Ascents. Behold, how good and pleasant
it is when brothers dwell in unity!
2 It is like the precious oil upon the head, running down upon
the beard, upon the beard of Aaron, running down on the collar of his
robes!
3 It is like the dew of Hermon, which falls on the mountains of Zion!
For there the LORD has commanded the blessing, life for evermore.
It is indeed wonderful when you are together with friends. The joy and fellowship warms the heart. True friends are those that are there to support you through the bad times as well as the good, are there to hold you accountable to what is right, are there to share your joy as well as your pain. May we all find such friends as these!
March 14, 1999, Monday, Fourth Week of Lent
After Spring Break, I am to meet with the priest at my church about starting a fellowship group for college age and singles. It's been my experience that in the Episcopal church, you either come as a part of a family or with your own. I still don't know what happens to those who are in between those two stages. This has laid heavily on my heart as of late and I suppose I am being called to do something about it. (I know I sound as Moses must have: (Exodus 3) 1 Moses answered, "What if they do not believe me or listen to me and say, `The LORD did not appear to you'?", 10 Moses said to the LORD, "O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.", 13 But Moses said, "O Lord, please send someone else to do it." - griping and complaining. But listening is something I'm slowly learning to do.)
Today's story of the fishes and loaves and the accompanying devotion from Forward Day by Day seems to give me another push. "For as my daughter pointed out, it shows a young person making a contribution to the community - not just getting something, or being the object of attention and concern. She liked that, and thought people should remember that when they thought of the young people in our parish. We have something to contribute, if you only ask us. Trust that what seems like small gifts will multiply."
May we all remember to give to our community - no matter what our gifts and talents, no matter what our age. Everyone has something valuable to contribute! (1 Corinthians 12:12 - The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.)
March 12, 1999, Friday, Third Week in Lent:
Gregory
the Great
"The more one knows, the less one believes."
Chinese for lunch and the above on my fortune cookie. These words set me to thinking. I have always maintained that the more we have learned as mankind, the more we have lost our ability to wonder. Remember when you were young and you feared the thunder? Somehow, that fear just isn't present when you know the molecular explanation behind it. Now, I'm not saying that knowledge is bad, or that we shouldn't do all that we can to learn. I love to learn new things! However, I feel that we fall in to the trap of thinking that because we can explain it, we understand it. We begin to put ourselves on par with God, thinking we know everything. Because of this, we begin to say to ourselves, "I don't need God. I know that there has to be a reasonable explanation as to why <fill in your miracle here> happened." But we can't explain everything. That's where faith comes in. (Hebrews 11:1 - "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.") Mysteries and miracles occur around us on a daily basis. Too bad we have lost our sense of wonder to really appreciate them. May we all restore our sense of wonder and be able to appreciate the beauty, majesty, and mystery of the things around us.
March
9, 1999, Tuesday, Third Week in Lent:
Gregory
of Nyssa
Last weekend, I bought an angel pin. I spent most of the time in front of the booth choosing between two angel pins - one named Freedom, and one Wisdom. I was informed that even though Wisdom cost a bit more, she was a limited edition that had been discontinued. In addition she was a bit larger than Freedom. I ended up choosing Wisdom. When I got home, I examined Wisdom more closely and found that she had been signed by her creator, Judy. In the end, it appears I made a wise choice - Wisdom will be worth much more than Freedom.
Why do I go through the trouble of telling you this story? It made me think. It brought to mind a few verses from 1 Kings 3 - when God offered Solomon anything Solomon wished for and Solomon chose wisdom:
5 At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon in a dream
by night; and God said, "Ask what I shall give you."
6 And Solomon said, "Thou hast shown great and steadfast love to
thy servant David my father, because he walked before thee in faithfulness,
in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart toward thee; and thou hast
kept for him this great and steadfast love, and hast given him
a son to sit on his throne this day.
7 And now, O LORD my God, thou hast made thy servant king in place of
David my father, although I am but a little child; I do not know how
to go out or come in.
8 And thy servant is in the midst of thy people whom thou hast chosen,
a great people, that cannot be numbered or counted for multitude.
9 Give thy servant therefore an understanding mind to govern thy people,
that I may discern between good and evil; for who is able to govern
this thy great people?"
10 It pleased the Lord that Solomon had asked this.
11 And God said to him, "Because you have asked this, and have not
asked for yourself long life or riches or the life of your enemies, but
have asked for yourself understanding to discern what is right,
12 behold, I now do according to your word. Behold, I give you a wise
and discerning mind, so that none like you has been before you and
none like you shall arise after you.
13 I give you also what you have not asked, both riches and honor, so
that no other king shall compare with you, all your days.
May we all seek wisdom over all other things - as wisdom can lead us to riches and freedom, but riches and freedom cannot lead us to wisdom.
March 8, 1999, Monday, Third Week in Lent:
A thunderstorm this afternoon reminded me of how little I can do against the fury of nature. Torrents of rain soaked everything in minutes and thunder came so quickly that the darkened sky seemed to growl constantly. From this evening's Psalm (77), we are reminded of God's awesome power:
13 Thy way, O God, is holy. What god is great like
our God?
14 Thou art the God who workest wonders, who hast manifested thy might
among the peoples.
15 Thou didst with thy arm redeem thy people, the sons of Jacob and
Joseph. [Selah]
16 When the waters saw thee, O God, when the waters saw thee, they
were afraid, yea, the deep trembled.
17 The clouds poured out water; the skies gave forth thunder; thy arrows
flashed on every side.
18 The crash of thy thunder was in the whirlwind; thy lightnings lighted
up the world; the earth trembled and shook.
And to think that Jesus calmed the storm that frightened the disciples so! Who of us could hope to do the same?
March 5, 1999, Friday, Second Week in Lent
I have started to read The Cloister Walk by Kathleen Norris. She speaks of the Benedictines and their idea of time. "In our culture, time can seem like an enemy; it chews us up and spits us out with appaling ease. But the monastic perspective welcomes time as a gift from God, and seeks to put it to good use rather than allowing us to be used up by it...'The Benedictines, more than any other people I know, insist that there is time in each day for prayer, for work, for study, and for play.' Liturgical time is essentially poetic time, oriented toward process rather than productivity, willing to wait attentively in stillness rather than always pushing to 'get the job done.'"
I believe this is why I am drawn to the Liturgical calendar. I feel as if I never have enough time in the day and therefore have to burn the candle at both ends just to keep up with life. Between the calendar and the prayer book, we are encouraged to establish a daily ritual that makes time for prayer and study as well as work and family - each having their own place and each important in its own right. This delicate balance is important to a well-balanced life that, as a result, brings feelings of peace and joy. Each season has its own special place in the daily, monthly, and yearly pattern of renewal in our lives. May you discover the joy and peace to be found in such a daily ritual.
February 17, 1999, Wednesday, Ash Wednesday
The Lenten season has begun and we begin to make our way toward Easter. I found an unusal perspective this year in my readings:
"This season of Lent is for us a time to do some spring cleaning.
We so easily clutter up our spiritual lives, adding pile upon pile until
we are unable to grow under the weight of it all. Penitance is about getting
rid of the clutter. It is not an easy task. There is much in our lives
that we don't want to let go of. Our pride, our preoccupation with our
own pursuits, our self-reliance, all of these things which separate us
from the love of God and prevent us from loving others as we should are
difficult to part with. We find a false security in the cluttered attics
of our lives. Yet, if we are able to make progress on our journey with
Christ, if we are able to move into closer union with Him, if we are able
to make our way through the wilderness of Lent and arrive at the Feast
of the Resurrection, we need to lighten our loads. We need to say in the
words of the General Confession, "the burden of them is intolerable;"
and ask God to lift the weight from our shoulders. We then discover that
Lent is a season of joy and liberation, for such is the fruit of penitance."
-- The Rev. David Henderson
An unusual view - most think of Lent as a time of sadness and sorrow.
May we all find that our Lent end in "joy and liberation" as our "fruit of penitance."